[Yeah, I know this is an old bad joke, and I know you're not supposed to take jokes too far. But this is how I'd see this story playing out in this world, in this church:]
[JMR202106071335 I gave this a bit of an edit and started it as a novel in my novels blog: https://joelrees-novels.blogspot.com/2021/06/frog-story-missionary-and-enchanted-princess.html]
Elder Michelson squatted down by the concrete irrigation mizo between the road and the water-covered rice field.
Elder Shirōto stopped beside him. "What ya lookin' at?"
"Just a cute little frog."
"Lots of cute little frogs in this field. Wait. That frog's not all that little." Elder Shirōto reached out to grab the frog, but it sprang out of reach, plopped into the water, then swam back to the edge of the field, to climb back out on to the side of the mizo and sit watching the two missionaries.
"Help me!" it croaked shrilly.
Elder Michelson started.
Elder Shirōto chuckled. "That's a high-pitched croak for a frog that big."
"That was not just a croak!" Elder Michelson glanced back at his companion, then looked back at the frog. "She said, 'Help me!'"
Elder Shirōto stared at his companion, then broke into a loud guffaw. "Right. Now it's going to say, 'I'm a beautiful princess, kiss me.'"
The frog puffed out its pouch. "I am a princess. Maybe I'm not so beautiful, but if you kiss me, you'll free me from this spell."
Elder Michelson's chin dropped to his chest as he stared at the frog.
Elder Shirōto started laughing. "What'd she say now? 'Kiss me and you'll live forever?" He paused for effect. "You'll be a frog, but you'll live forever. You should see your face, Elder Mishi."
"I said nothing of the sort. That's not the kind of spell I'm under," the frog ribbited huffily.
Elder Michelson looked back at his companion with amusement and then turned again to examine the frog. "That's not what she said. She's not under that kind of spell."
"Okay, Elder Mishi. You may be the senior companion and I may be the greenie, but I think we need to call the district leader and ask to be reassigned where there are people to teach. We've hailed at every door in this village three times this week, and getting a couple of doors slid shut in our faces is the best response we've had. You're letting it get to you."
"What a rude little boy he is. Don't listen to him. I need your help," the frog ribbitted plaintively.
"I'll admit, the way it croaks is cute." Elder Shirōto snickered.
"Yeah, cute." Elder Michelson stood up.
"Listen, I'm desperate. I can reward you well if you kiss me." The frog hopped closer.
"Reward? I don't guess either of us needs a reward."
"My father is powerful wizard king."
Elder Michelson squatted back down and reached out and picked up the frog, now quite docile in his hand, and put it in his jacket pocket.
"Hey! Wait." Her cry was muffled by the fabric.
"That frog has prejudices. Jumped away from me but lets you put it in your pocket.
"So? You don't seem to be able to hear her words."
The frog poked its head out of the pocket. "D&C 50. Maybe he's not listening to the same spirit."
"D&C 50? Elder Shiro, this frog also quotes scriptures."
"Well," Elder Shirōto was still snickering. "I guess we can't baptize her if she's already a member. What are you planning to do with her? -- it, I mean."
"We can teach members practice lessons and have gospel discussions and do service projects with them." Elder Michelson stood up, pushing the frog back into his suit pocket, and started walking. "So let's walk around the farms looking for people to help or talk to." He started walking towards the river.
"There's no need to take me any place special. You can break the spell anywhere, and here is just fine. Please?"
"Now she's, uhm," Elder Shirōto corrected himself again, "it's getting excited." He followed his companion.
"Please! I'll give you anything you want! I can do anything you want! -- for a day."
"Okay, so she wants you to kiss her."
"I thought you couldn't hear her."
"Two days!"
"I'm guessing. Hey, if I'm not careful, you're going to have me believing she's really talking. But you can't kiss her because you're a missionary."
"Right."
"Anything you want for a week!"
"She says she'll do anything we want for a week."
"Even if she weren't a member, we couldn't force her to be baptized."
"I'm not a member. I left the Church. But I'll be in the water forever if someone doesn't kiss me!"
"Shouldn't you be keeping this frog at arm's length?"
"Arm's length?" the frog croaked.
"I'm not touching her while she's in my pocket."
"You're rationalizing, Elder."
"Hmm." Elder Michelson stopped.
The frog poked it's head out of his pocket again. "Why won't you kiss me?"
"Why not kiss it and prove you're just imagining things? I mean, you have a naked frog in your pocket. Kissing a frog can't be breaking the rules much worse than carrying it around."
"Naked frog. That's ..."
"Anything you want for a whole month!" she exclaimed.
"A month? You'll do anything we want for a whole month?"
"Not we. Elder Michelson. I really think we should call the district leader."
"A month is long enough to teach someone the discussions again, wouldn't you say, Elder Shirōto?"
"That does it. That frog is possessed, and it's got you under some kind of curse, too, Elder. I'm calling the district leader." Elder Shirōto took out his cell phone and started dialing.
"Discussions? You would force me listen to your religion?"
"Well, since we can't force you to get baptized, I guess we probably shouldn't force you to listen, either."
"Answer your phone, Sister Morinokami, my companion's going crazy!" [Okay, not quite the Church of this present world.]
"Moshi-moshi. Sister Morinokami here." Her face came up on the screen. "I see you are excited, Elder Shirōto. What's the problem that your companion can't handle?"
"My companion thinks he has a talking frog in his pocket!"
"So he's talking to an imaginary frog?"
"No, the frog is real."
"Then the problem is that the frog can't talk?"
"Huh?"
"Let me try talking to the poor thing."
"Here, Elder Michelson, she wants to talk to you."
Elder Michelson took the phone. "Uhm, ..."
"Not you Elder Michelson, the frog!"
Elder Shirōto tilted his head in disbelief as Elder Michelson turned the phone so the frog was within the camera's view field.
"I can talk, and Elder Shirōto or whatever his name is, can't understand me."
"I see. Hello, Miss Frog. I am Sister Morinokami. What is your name?"
"It's not Frog."
"Okay, Miss Not-frog. What can we do for you?"
"She wants someone to kiss her and turn her back into a princess," Elder Michelson explained.
"What's this about a talking frog?" The voice of Sister Morinokami's companion, Sister Severus, came through the phone speakers.
"Let me handle this. Is what he says true, Miss Not-frog?"
"Pretty much. One little kiss and I'll be free of this spell."
"Well, kissing a princess would be breaking the rules, but kissing a frog, I think that would be an act of service."
"But," Elder Michelson pointed out, "a princess would be interesting, but princesses mostly waste their time trying to look beautiful. A talking frog, though, that's really cool."
"Elder Michelson!" Sister Morinokami remonstrated "You're being selfish."
"I think," Sister Severus commented, still off-screen, "we'd better call the mission president.
